Moments that define life

There are lots of moments that define our lives. Some stick with us forever and are never forgotten. Some change us forever. All of us have those moments...whatever they may be and they aren't all good. Some could ruin our lives if we let them, others are wonderful.



Up until recently the defining moment in my life was being diagnosed with cystic fibrosis. At 16 I was old enough to comprehend just what that meant and what cystic fibrosis was. At the time the life expectancy was just 32 and I was thinking...great I'm 16 and middle aged. I've chosen to battle CF with all I have and to get involved in making the lives of others with CF better. I could have given up and not fought thinking that CF will take my life one day anyway....instead I've learned to appreciate life more, to laugh more, to enjoy every minute because we never know which will be our last.



BUT...yes there is but....I had another, awful defining moment in my life. On March 14th, 2009 my life changed forever once again. No it wasn't my health...that I could handle, I am used to those kind of curve balls.

You see I became one of 17.7 million American women ...yes million....who are victims of rape or sexual assault. In a very short period of time my life flipped upside down, totally out of control. I am not going into detail because I don't think that is important for my blog or appropriate.

A horrifying experience I doubt I will ever forget that has changed me, my life and my family forever. Physical scars heal and mostly dissapear...emotional ones are most difficult. I reported it, dealt with police and the ER and while March 14th is now 3 months in the past I still have nightmares, I still have flashbacks.

This brings me to my newest journey....going from victim to survivor which in my mind I was a survivor March 14th. Healing and not letting that scumbag ruin my life or take any more of it than he already has.

I know in a lot of ways I am blessed....believed me everytime I see a missing poster for Brittanee Drexel I am reminded that in spite of it all I am blessed. Of course 3 months ago I would have told I would have been better off if he had killed me but now I know that is so not true

I don't want pity...I don't need pity. I am writer, this is how I heal and this is a tool to help me heal. Maybe it will help someone else, maybe it will help me in unexpected ways...who knows. But this is my story, my journey and a way for me to heal.