Does anybody hear her?

Forgive me and my feverish brain if this doesn't make much sense. What really brought this post to mind is the casting crowns song "does anybody hear her"

She is running .A hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction. She is trying but the canyon's ever widening. In the depths of her cold heart. So she sets out on another misadventure just to find.She's another two years older.And she's three more steps behind.Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?Or does anybody even know she's going down today?Under the shadow of our steeple.With all the lost and lonely people. Searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me

http://www.elyrics.net/read/c/casting-crowns-lyrics/does-anybody-hear-her-lyrics.html

First this was to be a post on loneliness as well thats what I've been feeling a lot lately. And then this song popped into my head and here it is.

I have often in the last months felt that noone hears or sees me or cares. I know thats not true and I know that often when faced with someone who been through something bad that it can be awkward...you don't know what to do.

I do know that what I have been through has brought me closer to some people and yet has distanced me from others who just really don't know how or to want to be around me. And I have felt incredibly lonely like noone could understand and truly it is hard for people to understand unless you've BTDT. I've dealt with some well meaning people who just made things 10x worse. I've heard "can't you just get over it" more than I care to admit. I've had people ask me point blank "was it consensual" (no you idiot I just called it rape for fun)...I've had people assume because I chose not to press charges that I was lying (no but I know what I can physically and emotionally handle and all I wanted was to try and get on with a normal life and not have that nightmare drag on...which I realize normal or what I thought was normal is gone but still...I disgress)

I've felt like a freak. I've been so lonely it hurts. But at the same time I didn't want someone being around me just because they felt sorry for me.

In doing some Bible reading I have to wonder how Jesus felt sometimes. His siblings thought he was a liar, people thought he was crazy, His own disciples at times doubted Him and one fo them betrayed Him/ He was perfectly innocent and yet was crucifed with killers. I know Jesus was God and never sinned but He was also human and I imagine felt very human emotions. So when we feel so lonely...our God truly understands for Jesus walked in our shoes, He felt human emotions...to me that is a great comfort.

I've also discovered that I have grown sensitive to other hurting people. Seeing someone else with similar hurts or very different hurts breaks my heart. I feel a kinship with them. I have become much more passionate about hurting people and drawn to those that might otherwise not be heard or seen.

So while its been a very difficult journey I see two things that have come out of my loneliness...That would be a new found deeper relationship with Jesus and a deeper faith and also a new and deeper compassion for hurting people.